Episode 33
From Stuck to Empowered: Unlocking Your Potential with Nina
The essence of our discussion today revolves around the profound realization that the act of transformation is less about altering one's actions and more about evolving one's identity. Many individuals embark on a relentless quest to modify their behaviors, adopting new habits and systems in pursuit of change, yet often find themselves ensnared in a cycle of stagnation. We delve into the notion that true change emerges not from external modifications, but from an internal metamorphosis that redefines who we are at our core. Our esteemed guest, Nina Amir, an esteemed high-performance coach and author, elucidates the mechanisms through which identity influences our capacity to enact meaningful change. By the conclusion of this episode, I trust you will gain valuable insights that will compel you to reassess your own identity in the context of your aspirations and potential for growth.
The conversation between Avik and Nina Amir delves into the profound intricacies of personal transformation, emphasizing that mere habit change is insufficient for genuine growth. It posits that individuals often find themselves ensnared in a cycle of attempting to modify external behaviors without addressing the underlying identity that motivates those behaviors. Nina articulates the essence of this conundrum: true change necessitates a metamorphosis of self—one must evolve into a different person rather than simply striving to do different things. Throughout the dialogue, Nina delineates the concept of being 'stuck', which may manifest even in those who appear outwardly successful, highlighting the internal barriers that prevent authentic fulfillment. The episode invites listeners to introspectively consider their own identities and the potential for change that lies within, challenging the notion that success is merely a product of external achievements rather than a reflection of one's inner self. As the discussion unfolds, Nina elaborates on the misconception that habit change stems solely from a lack of discipline. She asserts that many individuals mistakenly believe they must first attain motivation or structure before change can occur. However, she emphasizes that the crux of transformation lies in altering one’s identity and mindset. The conversation provides insightful strategies for listeners to identify and dismantle the limiting beliefs that hinder their progress, urging them to embrace their inherent creativity and potential for reinvention. This episode, rich with actionable insights, serves as a catalyst for listeners to initiate their own journeys of self-discovery and empowerment, fostering a deeper understanding of what it means to live a life that genuinely nourishes the soul.
Takeaways:
- Individuals often spend their entire lives attempting to alter their behaviors without achieving meaningful change.
- The fundamental challenge lies not in modifying actions but in transforming one's identity and mindset.
- Real transformation begins with the understanding that to effectuate change, one must first become a different person.
- Many individuals fail to recognize that being 'stuck' can manifest even in those who appear outwardly successful.
- A prevalent misconception is that habit change is primarily a matter of discipline rather than identity evolution.
- In order to create a life that nourishes the soul, one must commit to becoming the person capable of achieving their desires.
Links referenced in this episode:
Companies mentioned in this episode:
- Amazon
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
🎙️ Want to Be a Guest on Healthy Mind, Healthy Life?
Send me a direct message on PodMatch.
👉 DM Me Here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/avik
🌱 About Healthy Mind By Avik™️
Healthy Mind By Avik™️ Global Mental Wellness Podcast Network - focused, credible, no more identity clutter.
👉 Subscribe and be part of this healing journey.
Refer a Guest
Know someone who would be a great fit for one of our podcast shows? Email us at services@podhealth.club with the subject line “Refer a Guest.” Requests without this subject line cannot be catered to.
Support Our Podcast: Support this Podcast
📬 Contact & Links
Brand: Healthy Mind By Avik™️
Based in: India & USA
📌 Disclaimer - This episode is produced for educational and informational purposes only. All views expressed by the guest are their personal opinions alone and do not represent the views of the host or Healthy Mind by Avik™. The Network does not verify, endorse, or assume responsibility for any guest statements. Nothing in this episode constitutes medical, legal, financial, or professional advice, please consult a qualified professional before making any decisions. Listeners are encouraged to engage critically and independently with all content do not consume blindly. Use this content as a starting point for your own reflection and research, not as a substitute for professional guidance. Third-party content is referenced under fair use for informational purposes only. Guest speakers are solely responsible for their own statements.
If you have concerns about any content, please contact us here
By listening, you acknowledge and accept this disclaimer in full. Read detailed disclaimer here.
Transcript
Dear listeners, most people spend their whole life trying to change what they do.
Speaker A:They build new habits, follow better systems, read the right books, and still something doesn't shift, right?
Speaker A:What if the reason is very simple and also much harder than we think?
Speaker A:What if the real work is not about doing something different?
Speaker A:What?
Speaker A:But about becoming someone different?
Speaker A:So today we are going right to the root of that question.
Speaker A:And I think by the end of this conversation, you will also see yourself a little differently.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:Hey.
Speaker A:Dear listeners, welcome back to another powerful episode of Mind Meets Machine.
Speaker A:I'm your host, Avik, and this is the podcast and the space, I would say, where we explore what it means to be fully human in a world that's changing faster than most of us can process.
Speaker A:And my guest today is.
Speaker A:Please welcome Nina Amir.
Speaker A:So welcome to the show.
Speaker B:Thank you for having me.
Speaker B:It's my honor.
Speaker B:I'm excited to have this conversation.
Speaker A:Amazing.
Speaker A:Amazing.
Speaker A:Dear listeners, before we delve deep into the discussion today, I'll introduce you to Nina.
Speaker A:So Nina is known as the inspiration to Creation Coach, one of thousand elite certified high performance coaches working globally and an Amazon best selling author of four traditionally published books.
Speaker A:Her work with people who, who want to get unstuck, step into their potential and create lives that actually feed their souls.
Speaker A:And today we are talking about something that touches every single person listening, like its identity, mindset habits, and what it really takes to change from the inside out.
Speaker A:So why do it?
Speaker A:Let's get started.
Speaker A:Welcome to the show again, Dina.
Speaker B:Thank you again.
Speaker B:I'm excited to have this conversation.
Speaker B:This is all so interesting to me.
Speaker B:All the mindset stuff and habits and identity, all of that.
Speaker A:Exactly, exactly.
Speaker A:And I mean, you work with high performance people, high performing people who are on, I mean, who on the outside are already doing a lot, but there's something they are still missing.
Speaker A:So before we get into the framework and the strategies I want to share, my curiosity is like, what does stuck actually look like in someone who looks stressful?
Speaker A:I mean, sorry, not stressful.
Speaker A:I'd say who looks very successful from the outside.
Speaker A:So what's the version of stuck that nobody talks about?
Speaker A:Maybe from inside.
Speaker A:So what do you say?
Speaker B:So it's a good question.
Speaker B:Sometimes people know they're stuck and some people don't know they're stuck.
Speaker B:And so I have a friend who I think she knows she's stuck, but she, whenever I offer anything, any kind of suggestions or options or possibilities, she just shoots them down.
Speaker B:So from the outside, that looks very stuck.
Speaker B:From the inside, I have to imagine that it feels stuck, right?
Speaker B:Because.
Speaker B:Because she doesn't feel like she has any options.
Speaker B:And from a high performance coaching standpoint, we would call that someone who's living in a caged life.
Speaker B:So if you imagine a lion at a zoo, right, and it's all the way at the back of its cage, right?
Speaker B:It's all the way at the back and.
Speaker B:And it's staring at all the people, looking like it wants to eat them, right?
Speaker B:It's angry and looks just so frustrated that it can't get out and it's probably walked to the fence line millions of times and it knows it can't get out and so it doesn't even want to try because it feels like it's useless to try.
Speaker B:So that's caged.
Speaker B:And I think it's the same as stuck when we feel like we've tried everything and nothing worked.
Speaker B:And so we just have to accept that this is our life.
Speaker B:And from a coach's perspective, that's never where we want someone to be.
Speaker B:Because from my belief is that we are all creators and we always have the option to create something different, even if it's only in our mind, right?
Speaker B:So we can live in that cage and be happy, right?
Speaker B:Or we can live in that cage and be miserable, or we can decide that we're going to get out of the cage, right?
Speaker B:And that we're going to find some way.
Speaker B:So, you know, we often in the coaching industry talk about people who are very stuck and they're uncoachable, like it doesn't matter what we say, they're just not open to change.
Speaker B:And to me, that is stuck more than anything.
Speaker B:It's this unwillingness to change, this being very close to doing anything different.
Speaker A:Exactly, exactly.
Speaker A:And you know, like, I have to say, there's.
Speaker A:I think a lot of people just recognize themselves in that, like the kind of stuck that comes with the full calendar and quite feeling that none of it's quite right.
Speaker A:So here's also a part that I do bring in, like, about the misconception is that people treat habit change like a discipline problem.
Speaker A:Maybe like they could just be more consistent, more motivated, more structured and it would all click.
Speaker A:But you work with identity and mindset at a much deep level.
Speaker A:So what is the biggest misconception?
Speaker A:You see that people carry into the work of changing their lives.
Speaker B:They believe that they have to, that they can't have what they want, whether it's a new habit, more money, a job, a relationship.
Speaker B:They don't believe that they can have what they Want, until.
Speaker B:Let me reverse that.
Speaker B:They believe that when they have what they want, they will be someone who's happy, who's prosperous, whatever.
Speaker B:And that's backwards thinking because you have to change your identity, who you're being first.
Speaker B:So when you shift who you're being, your mindsets and habits line up almost immediately.
Speaker B:I mean, sometimes we have to keep reminding ourselves that this is who we are now.
Speaker B:But if we remind ourselves this is who we are, then the habits and mindsets shift.
Speaker B:So, for instance, if an easy example is a smoker.
Speaker B:Now I know smoking is addictive, nicotine or whatever, but there are people who quit cold turkey.
Speaker B:They do it by deciding that they are no longer smokers, they're non smokers.
Speaker B:And so a non smoker never questions whether to go into the store and buy cigarettes, let alone to smoke them.
Speaker B:There is no question because it's not who they are.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Whereas someone who is trying to develop the habit of being a non smoker or to drop the habit of smoking is going to constantly say, should I smoke a cigarette?
Speaker B:No, I shouldn't smoke a cigarette out of them.
Speaker B:Should I go buy some more?
Speaker B:No, maybe I shouldn't.
Speaker B:Maybe I should.
Speaker B:I'm just going to go do it, right?
Speaker B:And so when you shift your identity, that doesn't happen because it's just not who you are.
Speaker B:And a really easy or a simple example of this is from my own life.
Speaker B:So I used to have a morning routine, and then life got busy and I didn't have one anymore.
Speaker B:And I kept telling all my coaching friends that I wanted a morning routine.
Speaker B:And they would sit me down and they'd say, okay, what do you want to do?
Speaker B:First and second, what time are you going to get up?
Speaker B:And I was like, I can do that.
Speaker B:Like that part of it I understand, but I don't feel like I have the time in the morning to do it.
Speaker B:And so I just don't.
Speaker B:I just get up and I dive into other things.
Speaker B:And one day I realized that the only reason I didn't have a morning routine was because I believed I didn't have time.
Speaker B:But the reason I didn't have time was because I would hit the snooze button on my alarm three or four times, losing anywhere from 30 to 45 minutes every single morning.
Speaker B:That time block could be for my morning routine.
Speaker B:And so one night I went to bed and as I set the alarm for the morning, I said, tomorrow, when I wake up, I am no longer someone who hits the snooze button.
Speaker B:I am someone who wakes up and gets out of bed when the alarm rings.
Speaker B:And so I went to sleep and I woke up in the morning and the alarm goes off.
Speaker B:And of course, habitually, my, you know, just by habit, I hit the snooze button.
Speaker B:And then I remembered and I thought, no, that's not who I said I would be today.
Speaker B:I said, today I would be someone who turns the alarm off and gets out of bed.
Speaker B:And that is what I did.
Speaker B:And I have done that every day since.
Speaker B:Now, do I sometimes have to remind myself, yes, but for the most part, after several years of this, I just wake up when the alarm goes off and I get out of bed and I start my morning routine.
Speaker B:So it's that quick that you can say, this is now who I am.
Speaker B:And so now I have the habits and mindsets and I am creating what I want.
Speaker B:But I'll just add to that that, you know, again, like, if you're just waiting to have something to be someone, like I'm waiting to have the habit of getting out of bed in the morning when the alarm goes off.
Speaker B:If you're waiting to have that habit, you're going to keep struggling to have that habit because you have to shift your identity.
Speaker B:When you become someone who doesn't smoke, someone who writes every day, somebody who gets out of bed when the alarm goes off, someone who manages their money, someone who's an entrepreneur, someone who's an author.
Speaker B:When you decide that is who you are, you can then align your thoughts and habits with that.
Speaker B:What does that person do?
Speaker B:Like, how did they get that way?
Speaker B:How did they become a successful entrepreneur?
Speaker B:Like, that's who they are, but they did something to get there.
Speaker B:So what were their habits and mindsets?
Speaker B:What are the habits and mindsets they have now?
Speaker B:Adopt those, adopt the identity and adopt those habits and mindsets and everything changes.
Speaker B:Changes like that.
Speaker A:Amazing.
Speaker A:Like.
Speaker A:And when someone comes to you with the belief that they just need a better system or a better routine, what do you have to help them see first?
Speaker B:So if they say they need a better system, I say, okay, so, you know, do you believe that you are someone who is good with systems or developing systems?
Speaker B:And if they say no, then I say, well, that's the first thing you have to believe that you're someone who can at least learn to create systems.
Speaker B:And if you were such a person who could learn to create systems, what would you do?
Speaker B:Like, what would you think?
Speaker B:Well, I would think that my mindset would be, I'm someone who can figure it Out.
Speaker B:I'm someone who likes systems because before they might have been like someone who.
Speaker B:I hate systems and I don't know how to create them.
Speaker B:And that's just not who I am.
Speaker B:Well, no, you have to shift.
Speaker B:I'm someone who didn't used to like systems, but I realized the value of systems.
Speaker B:And I want to be someone who knows how to create systems and uses systems.
Speaker B:And so what would that person do?
Speaker B:Well, they'd go out and maybe figure, figure who could help them learn how to create systems.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Or they could say, well, okay, I understand that the system I need is X and I can sit down and I can figure out all the steps and then to implement them.
Speaker B:Okay, well, I've never been someone who implemented systems.
Speaker B:Okay, so be someone who implements systems and then you will.
Speaker B:So that's how I would approach it.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:And obviously, I mean what you are pointing to is that we cannot, I mean, we can't habit our way into a different identity.
Speaker A:The identity has to shift first or the habit just won't hold.
Speaker A:So that's such an important, I'd say inversion of the flow, like how most people think about change.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So if you also talk about the root causes, like, I mean, just want to understand, like when someone is living a life that is not feeding their soul and they know it, they feel it.
Speaker A:So what is the.
Speaker A:I mean, what's actually the deeper story?
Speaker A:Like not the surface reason they give, but the pattern that's actually running things.
Speaker B:So if somebody's not living a life that feeds their soul.
Speaker B:Let's just start there.
Speaker B:They're polygon, you know, the, the outer things or the easy surface things we would find out or that they feel like they should be doing something else.
Speaker B:Like they're trying to meet other people's expectations, they're afraid, all of that.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:I think that, I mean, those are most of the reasons why.
Speaker B:Well, maybe not most, but some of the top reasons.
Speaker B:People don't live a life that feeds their soul, neath.
Speaker B:Or maybe not even underneath.
Speaker B:Maybe it's just what they're not noticing is that they are not listening to their soul.
Speaker B:So they're so busy maybe that they don't pay attention to their intuition or their inspiration or they're so stuck in their comfortable life, what we would call comfortable life in high performance, which is where everything's pretty good but you know, it could be better, but you're not uncomfortable enough in your comfortable life to change anything.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Or you're listening to your brain's chatter, which is telling you it's scary to change.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:So I think that underneath they, you know, they're, they're living a life that, where they're just not paying any attention.
Speaker B:They don't have any awareness or consciousness of their soul speaking to them.
Speaker B:And it speaks to them in intuition and inspiration and sometimes passion.
Speaker B:And so if they're not paying any attention to that, they're not doing the things that are aligned with their highest good.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:And so I think that's the underlying problem, is they're not paying attention or they don't trust.
Speaker B:So they may be aware of when they're inspired.
Speaker B:Let's say not everybody feels like they know when they have intuitive hits.
Speaker B:But inspiration is pretty simple.
Speaker B:You know, you go, you hear some speaker and you get inspired and you're like, I'm gonna go do that thing, and then you don't.
Speaker B:Mel Robbins has a book, the Five second Rule, and she talks about how the brain is constantly trying to talk you out of.
Speaker B:It's its job, the, the reptilian part of the brain.
Speaker B:It's its job to keep you safe.
Speaker B:Anything different or new is unsafe as far as it is concerned, even though it's not.
Speaker B:And so you get inspired and the brain starts to say, no, no, no, you know, don't do that.
Speaker B:But what Mel Robbins says is you have 5 seconds, 5 seconds to take an action, otherwise your brain will talk you out of it.
Speaker B:And so, yeah, so I think people don't.
Speaker B:But we have to trust.
Speaker B:We have to trust even people.
Speaker B:If we go beyond the intuition to the inspiration, we have to trust that inspiration, that it's the right thing for us, that the reason we're inspired is because something inside us is saying, yes, that is for your highest good.
Speaker B:That's your growing edge.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:And, and so to me, I think underlying everything is that either we not hearing or paying attention to our soul's guidance, or we're not trusting enough to act on it.
Speaker A:Amazing.
Speaker A:Amazing.
Speaker A:And where does that story usually come from?
Speaker B:Well, I'm not sure for.
Speaker B:Cause it's different for everyone.
Speaker B:But it is definitely a story of I don't receive intuition.
Speaker B:It's not safe to go, you know, I'm not safe.
Speaker B:Comes from your brain, you know, I'll be judged, all those things.
Speaker B:Those are all brain stories.
Speaker B:And of course, all stories, everybody's story about why they can't trust and follow their intuition and inspiration is going to be a little different.
Speaker B:But, but all those stories come either from programming from other people or other sources or it comes from our life experiences.
Speaker B:And that is most often because if you take what you've been programmed by outside sources, it's usually some sort of experience.
Speaker B:A coach told you not to do something, or teacher said you were no good at something, or you told your mom you, you know, were psychic and she said, no, you're not.
Speaker B:So.
Speaker B:Or whatever it is.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:So you know, or you have a.
Speaker B:Your first relationship, love relationship, the person cheated on you, and so now you believe everybody's going to cheat on you.
Speaker B:Like, it's always something like that.
Speaker B:Something happens.
Speaker B:You tried to ride the bike and you fell off and you broke your leg.
Speaker B:And so now you never want to try anything athletic again.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Because you're bringing the past into the.
Speaker B:Into the present and the future and telling yourself you're not coordinated.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:I'm not.
Speaker B:I'm just someone who's not coordinated.
Speaker B:Well, so it goes back to all of that.
Speaker B:So why somebody wouldn't listen to and trust their intuition or their inspiration?
Speaker B:There's some story there.
Speaker B:Like you said, there's a story, but for everyone, it's going to be a little different.
Speaker A:Very true.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:For everyone, it's different.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:And also, like, if you talk about the actual work, not the theory, the lived experience of it.
Speaker A:So when someone comes to you ready to go deeper into their identity and the mindset, what does that process actually look like?
Speaker A:Like, what tends to be the first real turning point.
Speaker B:So no matter what kind of coaching I'm doing, high performance coaching or transformational coaching, what I'm looking for is where the person has blind spots, like, where they're just not seeing something.
Speaker B:So like, we talked about someone being stuck.
Speaker B:If I could give them five instances of when I made, you know, when I asked them a question or when I offered some kind of possibility and they shot it down, now we begin to see a pattern, and maybe they'll go, aha, I see.
Speaker B:Now I see it.
Speaker B:I mean, that's what you're looking for in coaching is that aha moment where your client goes, I get that.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:So if it's identity, then it's like, well, do you realize that you keep telling me this story about how you're uncoordinated and so you can't even, you know, you want to go on some hike, you know, some spiritual thing.
Speaker B:You know, you want to go on this hike and this journey and you won't go because you tell me you're.
Speaker B:You're uncoordinated and you're going to fall and you're going to break.
Speaker B:You know, you're going to break something.
Speaker B:Do you see how that's holding you back?
Speaker B:I point out their negative thinking.
Speaker B:Do you see that?
Speaker B:You know, you're constantly saying, I can't.
Speaker B:What if you could?
Speaker B:What if you could?
Speaker B:What becomes possible if you could?
Speaker B:And then they start to feel the difference between where they're stuck and what would happen if there was possibility to get out of that.
Speaker B:And then, of course, you have to bridge the gap with identity and mindset and all of those things.
Speaker B:But I think that answers your question.
Speaker A:Exactly, exactly.
Speaker A:And also about the actual work.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Like we're talking about.
Speaker A:So you describe yourself as an intuitive transformational catalyst.
Speaker A:I really love that phrase.
Speaker A:So what does the intuitive part of your work look like?
Speaker A:Like, how does it show up in a session?
Speaker B:That's an interesting question.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:So for me, my intuition, and I believe this is probably similar to a lot of people.
Speaker B:And my intuition, I hear it and it sounds like me.
Speaker B:So, like, if I were to go for a walk or sit down somewhere quietly and ask my intuition, like, just ask a question like, what's next for my highest good?
Speaker B:Something's gonna pop into my head pretty fast.
Speaker B:And it sounds like me.
Speaker B:I call it the still small voice, which we've heard about.
Speaker B:And, you know, but I think that's what it is.
Speaker B:People are looking for a booming voice outside themselves.
Speaker B:And some people have that.
Speaker B:Maybe not booming, but some people do hear things outside themselves.
Speaker B:You know, in terms of extra sensory perception, for me, it just sounds like me.
Speaker B:So in a session with a client, I will hear something and, you know, like it's a thought in my head that just keeps coming back and coming back, or I feel very strongly I need to tell them something.
Speaker B:That's often what it is.
Speaker B:I even do intuitive readings occasionally.
Speaker B:I always tell people that's what, you know, for me, it's.
Speaker B:It's this feeling like I need to tell them something.
Speaker B:I'm like, I have no idea where this is coming from, but I need to tell you this.
Speaker B:And they'll usually go, oh, that makes a hundred percent sense to me.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:So as I hear people speak, as I hear my clients speak, I just get a sense that there's something I need to say, and that's in my head.
Speaker B:It keeps, you know, popping up.
Speaker B:You need to tell them this, you need to tell them this.
Speaker B:And so I usually try to go with that.
Speaker B:I usually try to trust and to go with it.
Speaker B:Sometimes I piss my clients off.
Speaker A:Okay, okay.
Speaker A:And And I mean, obviously here's the part of conversation I always wanted to get to like, because the insight is the easy part for a lot of people.
Speaker A:And they have the big breakthrough in the session and they feel something shift and then life comes back, the old patterns comes back, the old voice comes back.
Speaker A:So how do you help someone hold on to those new identity when the world around them has not changed yet?
Speaker B:That's a really good question.
Speaker B:So that happens a lot, that people shift their identity, they're trying to change their habits or whatever and life gets in the way, Life gets too busy, something happens and they get triggered.
Speaker B:It's a constant reminder.
Speaker B:Who do you want to be in this moment?
Speaker B:Who do you want to be in this moment?
Speaker B:In the high performance world, we use what we call clarity words.
Speaker B:And so you have in your phone reminders of who you want to be, who you want to be in terms of work, who you want to be in terms of relationships, who you want to be in terms of success in general.
Speaker B:And that could be, you know, anything.
Speaker B:So you have three words for each of these categories.
Speaker B:And then in your phone you have alarms or reminders, and when they pop up, they have those words.
Speaker B:And so if you.
Speaker B:That's one of the things I tell all my clients to do, you know, okay, so who, who do you want to be?
Speaker B:You want to achieve X.
Speaker B:Like this is your goal, is this thing over here, and you need to be this person to achieve that.
Speaker B:And so let's remind you three times a day that that's who you want to be.
Speaker B:Like, just call it some things, you know, Susie, Successful Susie or whatever.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:But you know what it means.
Speaker B:And when that pops up on your phone, you don't swipe left and ignore it.
Speaker B:You look at it and you say, am I living into that identity right now?
Speaker B:So it's a constant reminder.
Speaker B:You have to keep reminding yourself, who am I being in this moment?
Speaker B:Who am I being in this moment?
Speaker B:Life has happened and I see that I am that person again that I was.
Speaker B:Who do I choose to be?
Speaker B:The thing is, we all have choice and we can choose to be the person that we have decided to be.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:Of course, we also have to have a high commitment level.
Speaker B:If you look at your life, you know what you're committed to.
Speaker B:So if every time you decide to change your identity or your habits or whatever, and then life happens and you go right back to being who you were, then you're not committed to it, not committed yet.
Speaker B:The other thing is self integrity.
Speaker B:We have the ability.
Speaker B:Most of us have a very easy time telling other, making promises and commitments to other people and keeping them.
Speaker B:But when we make them to ourselves, not so much.
Speaker B:So we lack self integrity.
Speaker B:So you have to up your commitment level and up your self integrity level so that every time you find yourself in one of those situations where you have fallen back into being who you were before and not who you want to be now that you say no, that this is not who I want to be, I want to be this.
Speaker B:And so I'm going to just shift and I'm going to be that.
Speaker B:And sometimes you have to do that a lot.
Speaker A:Very true.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:That's amazing.
Speaker A:And like I want to also ask you something maybe a bit personal.
Speaker A:Like I mean the person who might be listening right now who has been sitting with a dream or maybe the world, another version of their life they can almost picture for a long, very, very long time, they're not sure they are allowed to want it and they are not sure that they are the kind of person who gets to have it.
Speaker A:So what do you want to mention?
Speaker B:Everyone can have what they want.
Speaker B:Everyone.
Speaker B:Well, let's put it this way, because they're going to say no, I can't.
Speaker B:There's this reason I can't.
Speaker B:But everyone is worthy of having what they want.
Speaker B:Everyone deserves what they want.
Speaker B:The idea that we don't is again from past experience.
Speaker B:Somebody told you you couldn't have something.
Speaker B:You weren't a good girl or a good boy and so you couldn't have it.
Speaker B:Somebody told you that it's impossible to create what you desire.
Speaker B:Somebody said, you know, all this stuff about living a life that feeds your soul is bunk and you know, baloney and you know, whatever, right?
Speaker B:And so they have a belief system and so you know, you want to try to uncover that.
Speaker B:But to me, understanding why is less important than making a decision in the moment that that's just not what you choose to believe anymore.
Speaker B:We can go back, we can sit on the therapist's couch for years looking for the why, the reasons that will not change anything gives you understanding, but it doesn't change anything.
Speaker B:You know, so you could understand it all you like, but you still have to make a decision to do something differently.
Speaker B:And so I believe everyone is a creator at our core.
Speaker B:That is who we are.
Speaker B:We are creators.
Speaker B:We create with our thoughts, we create with our which become beliefs.
Speaker B:So we become, we create with our beliefs, with our energy, with our actions.
Speaker B:All of it is that, you know, woo woo and law of Attraction Stuff, yes.
Speaker B:But it is also inherent to who we are.
Speaker B:It is just a fact that this is who we are.
Speaker B:And so when you say I can't have it, I don't deserve to have it, whatever, then you're tamping down your creative ability.
Speaker B:You have to stand in your power and your freedom to choose something different, be someone different, create something different.
Speaker B:So yeah, yeah.
Speaker B:I don't know if that answered your question, but I think so.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker A:And also, I mean what I'm carrying from this conversation is like you cannot build a life that feeds your soul while also holding an irony that starves it.
Speaker A:So the real work has always been about who you are willing to become and not just what you are willing to do.
Speaker A:So with this, like Nina, like this has genuinely been one of the most valued conversation where I feel like I, I definitely want to quickly, I mean quietly for a few minutes afterward, like just sit with it and understand and I mean grasp all those things.
Speaker A:So like, for anyone who is listening, who wants to go deeper into your work, find you your books and work with you, where is the best place to connect with you?
Speaker B:First of all, thank you for saying that.
Speaker B:I enjoyed the conversation too.
Speaker B:I love talking about this and I would just, I like that you, you mentioned starving your soul.
Speaker B:Because whenever we're not following our inspiration, our intuition, our passion, when we're doing the things we should or expected to, or we feel just so stuck, then we are starving our soul.
Speaker B:I mean the soul isn't going to starve, literally, but we're not.
Speaker B:It's telling us what to do to help other us thrive and grow.
Speaker B:And we're not doing that.
Speaker B:So with that said, I have, you can find me very easy.
Speaker B:My name Ninaamir Khan.
Speaker B:So N I N A A M I R Com.
Speaker B:Everything I do is there.
Speaker B:My books, my courses, my programs, my coaching, everything is there.
Speaker B:On social media mostly you can either find me by my name, Nina Amir, or you can find me as the Inspiration to Creation Coach.
Speaker B:So just search Inspiration to Creation Coach.
Speaker B:It's very long or Inspiration to creation and you should find me.
Speaker B:And yeah, and I'm on most social media.
Speaker B:Some I'm more active than others.
Speaker B:I'm more active on Facebook and Instagram and then probably third LinkedIn.
Speaker B:But you can find me all those places and there are contact forms on my website chances there's a little tab you can click or a pop up that for a free 15 minute session with me.
Speaker B:So if anybody listening, you know, wants to find out more or see if we're a good match to work together, they can always schedule a free 15 minute.
Speaker A:Amazing.
Speaker A:So, and, and also like dear listeners, what I'll do is I'll put all the links and the details into the show notes so that you can easily reach out to Nina.
Speaker A:And with this, that's a wrap up today's episode of Mind Means Machine.
Speaker A:Dear listeners, so if something Nina said that today landed for you, don't just push past it, like sit with it.
Speaker A:Ask yourself the question that she's been asking her clients for years and years, like who do I need to be to create what I actually want?
Speaker A:And you will definitely find show notes, episode links, details, everything into the.
Speaker A:Into our website, which is Podhub Club.
Speaker A:And if you.
Speaker A:If this one moment or one meant something to you, pass it on to someone in your life where or who's actually ready for it.
Speaker A:So with this hope, until next time, this is your host, Avig.
Speaker A:Then this is Mindmates Machine.
Speaker A:Stay curious, stay honest with yourself and see you soon on next episode.
Speaker A:Thank you so much.
Speaker B:Thank you.